It is not hard to be disappointed with life since so many friends and family members around us have given up on their dreams, their passions we just follow their lead. There are plenty of people that will agree with us that life is disappointing, but it you are tired of being disappointed then you are tired of hearing it. I have a client who recently got tired of disappointing her mother. After a long discussion it became clear that she felt responible for her mothers happiness and was constantly either advising her or making decisions for her mother. She realized to have an adult relationship with her mother she had to change her expectations as in stop having them. She began to allow her mother to make her own decision and only supported her when asked to. She is no longer disappointed in how her mother acts around her and her mother is no longer acting disappointed.
Let me break it down for you:
1. Change your expectations (let go of your expectations)
2. Change your own behavior to reflect either less expectation or no expectations around other peoples behaviors.
3. Things and people improve when we stop concentrating on how they have failed us.
This is only a beginning. When we work together you will learn how to love life again, you will learn to take risks again and grab on to life, let’s get started!
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
(404) 259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Friday, June 24, 2011
Friday, June 17, 2011
How Sick Of Fear Are You?
Are you exhausted from living in fear? It impacts our sleep, our decisions, and
our relationships. The crazy thing is fear is something we have made up in our own minds most of the time. It is the stories we tell our selves. Let me give you an example I have a client who is working hard on this exact thing, because of her tendency to shut friends out after uncomfortable interaction with them. About a month ago one of her friends said something that came across as critical to my client but when she repeated it to me I could see many different ways to interpret the statement. After discussing several versions she acknowledge that without asking she actually did not know if her friend intended it the way she took it. Jumping to conclusions is easy and we think it protects us but in the end all it does is isolate us and make us feel as though we can not trust anyone. I always encourage my clients to pick the story that leaves them feeling good instead of bad or stand up and ask what the person meant instead of assuming.
our relationships. The crazy thing is fear is something we have made up in our own minds most of the time. It is the stories we tell our selves. Let me give you an example I have a client who is working hard on this exact thing, because of her tendency to shut friends out after uncomfortable interaction with them. About a month ago one of her friends said something that came across as critical to my client but when she repeated it to me I could see many different ways to interpret the statement. After discussing several versions she acknowledge that without asking she actually did not know if her friend intended it the way she took it. Jumping to conclusions is easy and we think it protects us but in the end all it does is isolate us and make us feel as though we can not trust anyone. I always encourage my clients to pick the story that leaves them feeling good instead of bad or stand up and ask what the person meant instead of assuming.
Fear of loosing our job, getting a new job, starting a new relationship, telling our partners exactly how we feel and on and on and on, we could list more fears but the result is the same it stops us from taking risks. Stop telling your self the negative stories and start telling your self the good stories so you step into your future now. Coaching can be a solution to overcoming your fears. When we work together you will learn to move through your fear and successfully accomplish the goals you have set for yourself!
Friday, June 3, 2011
Remember Tag your it?
On my trip to Oregon to visit my sister and her family I watched her dogs play their version of tag. Riley and Tucker would chase each other, play fight and dodge each other until the smaller dog Riley needed a break. Riley would run to the same tree over and over again and when she did Tucker would run over and wait for Riley to run away from the tree. He never followed her, he would just wait for when she was ready to play again. The tree was "base" if you played tag you remember sometimes playing with a safe base well Riley has a safe tree.
This reminded me that we all need a place we feel safe and comfortable taking a break from everything going on around us. If you don't have a safe place in your house it is time to make one. There are different place you can do this for many women this can be the bathroom, for many men it is their man cave. Whatever the name and no matter what the size make sure you have somewhere to go that you feel good about.
Homework: Take the que from Riley and spend sometime today enjoying quiet time in your safe place!
Want to give Life Coaching a try give me a call (404) 259-1335!
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
(404) 259-1335
http://www.coachingyourdreams.com/
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
This reminded me that we all need a place we feel safe and comfortable taking a break from everything going on around us. If you don't have a safe place in your house it is time to make one. There are different place you can do this for many women this can be the bathroom, for many men it is their man cave. Whatever the name and no matter what the size make sure you have somewhere to go that you feel good about.
Homework: Take the que from Riley and spend sometime today enjoying quiet time in your safe place!
Want to give Life Coaching a try give me a call (404) 259-1335!
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
(404) 259-1335
http://www.coachingyourdreams.com/
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
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