Sign up for my monthly newsletter, just follow this link:
http://eepurl.com/Nfiz
Any questions or topics you would like me to write about email greta@CoachingYourDreams.com or comment on this blog.
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
(404) 259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Monday, December 27, 2010
Recovering from the holidays
I hope everyone is enjoying the holidays but if you are not here are a few tips for pulling out of your holiday slump/stress. Stress impacts our health in a negative way so lets de-stress:
1. Take a walk even if it is cold out (mall walk) make sure you walk or work out minimum of twenty minutes.
2. Eat healthy and drink a lot of water.
3. Get around people you enjoy ASAP!
4. Remember to love you self it makes it easier for others to love you as well!
5. Decide to have a better day!
If you need a hug go get one or give it to your self.
Any questions or if you would like coaching call Greta (404) 259-1335.
or email greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
1. Take a walk even if it is cold out (mall walk) make sure you walk or work out minimum of twenty minutes.
2. Eat healthy and drink a lot of water.
3. Get around people you enjoy ASAP!
4. Remember to love you self it makes it easier for others to love you as well!
5. Decide to have a better day!
If you need a hug go get one or give it to your self.
Any questions or if you would like coaching call Greta (404) 259-1335.
or email greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Friday, December 17, 2010
The importance of keeping an accurate Calender!
Well, you must have a hint about the subject I wish to discuss by reading the title, so let me jump right in! I went to the wrong holiday party. I was sick when I said yes to going to one holiday party, but no excuses I did not write it down accurately. There was no address on the email invite and the person inviting me only has a couple of groups in common with me. I did not read the full name of the group throwing the party and then later assumed it was one of the groups we had in common. What a mistake, a funny mistake that is! I ended up at a party where I did not know anyone and I was very confused about why my friend never showed. I did have a pleasant time and some great food however.Here is what I learned: read the entire invite, write down all the important information and ask questions when confused. Have a wonderful weekend everyone.
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
(404) 259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
(404) 259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Friday, November 19, 2010
Practical steps to handle the holidays
Step one- Make sure you keep some me time through the holiday season try to have a little daily
Step two- Plan out as much as you can i.e. meals and shopping
Step three- When you feel the pressure start to build take several deep breaths and take a short walk even if it is only to the bathroom
Step four- Remember most holidays are about giving thanks, being grateful, celebrating or something close so have some fun
Step five- Repeat steps one through five as often as needed :-).
Need help this holiday season dealing with holiday stress call Greta (404) 259-1335
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
(404) 259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Step two- Plan out as much as you can i.e. meals and shopping
Step three- When you feel the pressure start to build take several deep breaths and take a short walk even if it is only to the bathroom
Step four- Remember most holidays are about giving thanks, being grateful, celebrating or something close so have some fun
Step five- Repeat steps one through five as often as needed :-).
Need help this holiday season dealing with holiday stress call Greta (404) 259-1335
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
(404) 259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Friday, November 12, 2010
Thursday, November 11, 2010
While walking the dogs I realized...
So… I was out walking the dogs during my favorite part of the evening right when the sun hits the tops of the trees and I thought what a beautiful night. I have struggled building my business as a coach many times wondering how I would pay my bills at the end of the month but always finding a way. I realized that often during the dark days of my business beginnings I would forget to enjoy my favorite time of the evening. Don’t let stress and distress block you from enjoying the smaller moments in life. Take time to experience the things you love.
If you’re having trouble enjoying the little things in life and you want to call Greta (404) 259-1335 she can help.
Greta would love any question or comments on this blog, please feel free to email her at greta@coachingyourdreams.com
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
(404) 259-1335
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
www.CoachingYourdreams.com
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
When the clouds come!
I am sitting at the local library looking out the window and hoping for inspiration to write this blog and it hits me write about the weather. Ok I know the weather is boring, don't check out yet, if you read my blog you know it is short but sweet so bear with me. The weather looks and acts a lot like our emotional state at times. It is easy to feel like the clouds will be here forever and get the blues. There are places like Oregon or England for example where there are weeks where they barely see the sun, but even in these place the sun eventually shines.
The weather is always transitory no matter what the weather will change much like our emotional state. The fastest way to move to a new emotion is to accept the one we are in right now. By allowing the emotion and not fighting with our selves about how we should feel we let go and move on. We have to accept the weather for what it is and when we do and just get on with our day eventually the weather changes. Try it out accept your emotion for what it is and get on with your day and see what happens?
Having trouble letting go of troubling emotions and it is blocking you from having the kind day you want contact Greta at (404) 259-1335.
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
(404) 259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
The weather is always transitory no matter what the weather will change much like our emotional state. The fastest way to move to a new emotion is to accept the one we are in right now. By allowing the emotion and not fighting with our selves about how we should feel we let go and move on. We have to accept the weather for what it is and when we do and just get on with our day eventually the weather changes. Try it out accept your emotion for what it is and get on with your day and see what happens?
Having trouble letting go of troubling emotions and it is blocking you from having the kind day you want contact Greta at (404) 259-1335.
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
(404) 259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
Thursday, October 21, 2010
What do cleaning your house and mind have in Common?
Have you ever noticed when you clean your bedroom there is a point when it looks like a bigger mess than when you started? Have you ever noticed when you hurt yourself the cut starts bothering you again right before it is done healing? I swear check it out next time you get cut/not a scratch pay attention it will stop bothering you and then just when the scab is about to come off it will get itchy/irritating.
It is the same when we are trying to changing our thinking about something. Just when we feel like giving up because we have worked hard at not thinking negatively we will have our break through. We must keep practicing through the frustration of things temporarily getting worse to make this happen.
So we must never give up!!
Need help never giving up call (404) 259-1335
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
(404) 259-1335
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
http://www.coachingyourdreams.com/
It is the same when we are trying to changing our thinking about something. Just when we feel like giving up because we have worked hard at not thinking negatively we will have our break through. We must keep practicing through the frustration of things temporarily getting worse to make this happen.
So we must never give up!!
Need help never giving up call (404) 259-1335
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
(404) 259-1335
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
http://www.coachingyourdreams.com/
Friday, October 1, 2010
Falling Down the Stairs
So...... I fell down some stairs the other day; well last Sunday to be exact, I have not been able to work out since. Just in case you were wondering I saved the brooms I was carrying to the garage, they came out with out a scratch. The bruise on my fanny is multi-colored now and I am getting a little stir crazy. This forced break has only driven the point home that our bodies must move to feel good.
I have heard many times that the body follows the mind, this is a Western view; in Eastern philosophy they are not separate one can not be without the other. This could become a big philosophical discussion but I don't want to go down that road so, just consider this when the body is sick eventually the mind is and vis-a-versa.
A friend of mine would say at this point "so workout people". It also means we must keep our mind's engaged and active. I am back to walking now and hopefully will be running soon. Get out and enjoy the weather. In fact get out and get over to the Biltmore Ballrooms (817 W. Peachtree, Atl GA) at 6:30pm and have some fun with us at our Fashion Show and Cocktail Party.
If you are having trouble getting balance in your life give me a call at (404) 259-1335 and schedule a free session.
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
I have heard many times that the body follows the mind, this is a Western view; in Eastern philosophy they are not separate one can not be without the other. This could become a big philosophical discussion but I don't want to go down that road so, just consider this when the body is sick eventually the mind is and vis-a-versa.
A friend of mine would say at this point "so workout people". It also means we must keep our mind's engaged and active. I am back to walking now and hopefully will be running soon. Get out and enjoy the weather. In fact get out and get over to the Biltmore Ballrooms (817 W. Peachtree, Atl GA) at 6:30pm and have some fun with us at our Fashion Show and Cocktail Party.
If you are having trouble getting balance in your life give me a call at (404) 259-1335 and schedule a free session.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Friday, September 17, 2010
Monday, September 13, 2010
Friday, September 10, 2010
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Running without Shoes
I am reading a book called "Born to Run" by Christopher McDougall. I learned something that many athlete's, personal trainers and running enthusiast probable already know, running with no shoes or not much of a shoe is better than cushioned shoes. I was shocked this was so contrary to how I was raised as a runner. I was also excited because as I have gotten older I am dealing with more pain and anything that can limit injury is good.
I ran for the first time yesterday with little shoe to protect my feet (indoor soccer shoes) and they are right I experienced less pain during the run and less pain after the run. I am sold after one experience. Those friends and family members that know me can tell you two things about how I believe we should manage our stress:
1. The answers should be simple and easy to implement.
2. Exercise is a huge part of how we stay stress free.
This made me reflect, I am a believer that less in more and this idea about running with less cushion fits that perfectly. Please don't feel like I am telling you to become a runner, I am not, although I am supportive of the idea. Humans through evolutions, genetics adn culture are set up to be action oriented and to move physcially. Of course we need periods of rest and relaxation but these should be separated by periods of intense action and/or movement or both. So whether you put your shoes on or take them off get moving your life is waiting.
If this sounds like a forgein langurage and you don't know either what I am talking about or how to begin, but you want to have less stress and more fun call me at (404) 259-1335 or email greta@coachingyourdreams.com.
Greta Jaeger, LPC CPLC
http://www.coachingyourdreams.com/
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
(404) 259-1335
I ran for the first time yesterday with little shoe to protect my feet (indoor soccer shoes) and they are right I experienced less pain during the run and less pain after the run. I am sold after one experience. Those friends and family members that know me can tell you two things about how I believe we should manage our stress:
1. The answers should be simple and easy to implement.
2. Exercise is a huge part of how we stay stress free.
This made me reflect, I am a believer that less in more and this idea about running with less cushion fits that perfectly. Please don't feel like I am telling you to become a runner, I am not, although I am supportive of the idea. Humans through evolutions, genetics adn culture are set up to be action oriented and to move physcially. Of course we need periods of rest and relaxation but these should be separated by periods of intense action and/or movement or both. So whether you put your shoes on or take them off get moving your life is waiting.
If this sounds like a forgein langurage and you don't know either what I am talking about or how to begin, but you want to have less stress and more fun call me at (404) 259-1335 or email greta@coachingyourdreams.com.
Greta Jaeger, LPC CPLC
http://www.coachingyourdreams.com/
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
(404) 259-1335
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Five steps to de-clutter your desk
Try this and remember the fastest way to change a behavior is to replace it with another behavior!
1. Admitted you have a problem i.e. your desk is a mess!
2. Assess the damage and the time it will take to clean up.
3. Take action quickly before you lose your nerve and distract yourself with an easier project.
4. If you can't finish in the time you alloted put it in your schedule as soon as possible. Make sure you finish.
5. Pat youself for a job well done
Is cluttering stopping you from living a dream? Try a sample session to
de-clutter (insert your mess) ...... example, my messy desk keeps me feeling disorganized and interfers with building my business when I lose numbers and waste time finding things. Offer expires 9/15/2010.
E-mail Greta today schedule your session today to begin living your dream!
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
http://www.coachingyourdreams.com/
(404) 259-1335
1. Admitted you have a problem i.e. your desk is a mess!
2. Assess the damage and the time it will take to clean up.
3. Take action quickly before you lose your nerve and distract yourself with an easier project.
4. If you can't finish in the time you alloted put it in your schedule as soon as possible. Make sure you finish.
5. Pat youself for a job well done
Is cluttering stopping you from living a dream? Try a sample session to
de-clutter (insert your mess) ...... example, my messy desk keeps me feeling disorganized and interfers with building my business when I lose numbers and waste time finding things. Offer expires 9/15/2010.
E-mail Greta today schedule your session today to begin living your dream!
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
http://www.coachingyourdreams.com/
(404) 259-1335
Friday, August 13, 2010
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Five things I learned helping out a friend
Hanging out at the health clinic with a friend who has a case of systemic poison ivy. Yes, you read it correctly and when poison ivy gets in your blood it does not matter if you take a bath in calamine it won't help. She is one big oozing mess right now and, yes, she is contagious so don't touch her. Anyway while my friend is getting her cortizone shot here is what I learned.
1. I write a lot more sitting at a clinic than I do in my own office.
2. Little children can be cute even when they are screaming.
3. Some people literally can sleep anywhere (i.e. the guy snoring five feet from me sitting up).
4. You can have fun and laugh anywhere.
5. Children can even have fun playing in a chair.
Just in case you don't know here is what posion ivy looks like according to wikapedia.
Image via Wikipedia
Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLCC
http://www.coachingyourdreams.com/
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
(404) 259-1335
1. I write a lot more sitting at a clinic than I do in my own office.
2. Little children can be cute even when they are screaming.
3. Some people literally can sleep anywhere (i.e. the guy snoring five feet from me sitting up).
4. You can have fun and laugh anywhere.
5. Children can even have fun playing in a chair.
Just in case you don't know here is what posion ivy looks like according to wikapedia.
Image via Wikipediahttp://www.coachingyourdreams.com/
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
(404) 259-1335
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Feel the fear and do it anyway
Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.
When did we get afraid to fail? Why do we often name people who fail losers? What were we thinking when it became common place to not risk, to avoid failure at all costs, and to let our fears make decisions for us. When I was just finishing college a friend suggested I read the book "Feel the fear and do it anyway". I bought the book and read about half of it and then put it down. I may not of finished the book but the idea of facing my fears instead of hiding from them has stuck with me all these years.
I have had times when I lived in fear of even going to my mail box to face my bills. I have had times when life seemed daunting and overwhelming. I would inevitably always come back to the main concept of the above mentioned book "Feel the fear and do it anyway". This eventually lead to living more fully. I know you are saying that is too easy and I will tell you what I tell my clients "no it is not easy but it is simple, we as humans complicate it." The reality is facing your fears is the fast way to let them go and we often find they are not as scary as we thought.
You maybe wondering how you do that? One way is to what I did to face my bills; I took a deep breath and put one foot in front of the other until I got to the mail box, then I opened it, and then I took a deep breath and I look at my mail. It was not easy and I did swear but it was simple. I have always preferred simple when facing my fears because just doing the next step is simple and easier than trying to accomplish everything at once. So take a deep breath and face your fears.
Need help facing your fears give me a call Greta Jaeger at (404) 259-1335 or contact me at greta@CoachingYourDreams.com. If you email me in the subject line put either question or coaching.
In the words of Eleanor Roosevelt, "You must feel the fear and do it anyway."
Greta
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Life-Get Addicted, "Become a Lifeaholic"
This is the title to my seminar. I will be speaking in Alpharetta, GA at Roam Atlanta 6:30pm on July 22nd
lifeaholic.eventbrite.com
If there is any addiction to have we should be addicted to LIFE. I realize using the word addiction goes against the beliefs of the times, but just hear me out. In order to survive, and evolve we learned habits that kept us fed, watered, housed and safe. We learned to use our knowledge and experience to create habits that helped us grow stronger and kept our children safe when we had to leave. Without having habits we would have had to relearn survival skills over and over again. That sounds exhausting to me, what about you?
Ok, so habits can and do turn into addictions at times particularly when we are unhappy and choose to avoid are problems instead of face them. This is of course the reason we think of the word addiction in a negative light. I know I can be long wind again bear with me, here is my point. Being addicted to life means you have habits but they don't run you, you run them. It means you have a habit of facing your problems not running from them. You work to have healthy habits and to learn how to be happy from the inside. We have all met people addict to life and their enthusiasm is catching. When we are addicted to life people want to be around us and we know how to live in the moment. Does this sound like the kind of addiction you could live with?
Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLCC
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
(404) 259-1335
lifeaholic.eventbrite.com
If there is any addiction to have we should be addicted to LIFE. I realize using the word addiction goes against the beliefs of the times, but just hear me out. In order to survive, and evolve we learned habits that kept us fed, watered, housed and safe. We learned to use our knowledge and experience to create habits that helped us grow stronger and kept our children safe when we had to leave. Without having habits we would have had to relearn survival skills over and over again. That sounds exhausting to me, what about you?
Ok, so habits can and do turn into addictions at times particularly when we are unhappy and choose to avoid are problems instead of face them. This is of course the reason we think of the word addiction in a negative light. I know I can be long wind again bear with me, here is my point. Being addicted to life means you have habits but they don't run you, you run them. It means you have a habit of facing your problems not running from them. You work to have healthy habits and to learn how to be happy from the inside. We have all met people addict to life and their enthusiasm is catching. When we are addicted to life people want to be around us and we know how to live in the moment. Does this sound like the kind of addiction you could live with?
Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLCC
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
(404) 259-1335
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Is there a science to getting "Happy"?
Yes, of course there is a science. It is not a pill or a quick fix, however. Lasting happiness takes times and effort just like anything in life worth working towards. We are conditioned to believe setting and achieving goals is the way to get happy. We were mislead, the intention was to help but instead it confused us. Working towards goals can help us with learning to be happy but it is not the answer to sustained "Happiness".
The next question what brings sustained happiness? We all know that money and things is not the answer so what is the answer. I had a mentor one time who loved to say "Money can't buy happiness, but it sure does make it easier." Ok, so I don't buy this either, although I think he really meant if you are not struggling to feed and house yourself it is easier to be happy. He was only partially correct and this could be a long blog if I went in depth, so I am going to keep it short. It can be easier to have a good attitude if we are not struggling for food and water and a dry place to sleep. However, I have met homeless people with amazing attitudes about life and their purpose in life. It is not necessary to always know where our next meal is coming from to have a great attitude about life.
Some of you have already figured out one of the keys is attitude. Attitude can be trained just like we were trained to talk and walk, we can learn a better attitude. A part of having a great attitude is learning to train our perception as well instead of letting our brain have control; we must control our brain, our thoughts. These are all parts of the science of sustained "Happiness" and you can see why I say it takes time and training.
If you think that my ideas are wrong be scientific and test them practice having a good attitude one day and a bad attitude the next see which day ends with you feeling good. You can do the same with your perception of things that happen to you. If you want to know more about the science of getting "Happy" contact me at:
Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLCC
(404) 259-1335
greta@coachingyourdreams.com
www.CoachingYourDream.com
The next question what brings sustained happiness? We all know that money and things is not the answer so what is the answer. I had a mentor one time who loved to say "Money can't buy happiness, but it sure does make it easier." Ok, so I don't buy this either, although I think he really meant if you are not struggling to feed and house yourself it is easier to be happy. He was only partially correct and this could be a long blog if I went in depth, so I am going to keep it short. It can be easier to have a good attitude if we are not struggling for food and water and a dry place to sleep. However, I have met homeless people with amazing attitudes about life and their purpose in life. It is not necessary to always know where our next meal is coming from to have a great attitude about life.
Some of you have already figured out one of the keys is attitude. Attitude can be trained just like we were trained to talk and walk, we can learn a better attitude. A part of having a great attitude is learning to train our perception as well instead of letting our brain have control; we must control our brain, our thoughts. These are all parts of the science of sustained "Happiness" and you can see why I say it takes time and training.
If you think that my ideas are wrong be scientific and test them practice having a good attitude one day and a bad attitude the next see which day ends with you feeling good. You can do the same with your perception of things that happen to you. If you want to know more about the science of getting "Happy" contact me at:
Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLCC
(404) 259-1335
greta@coachingyourdreams.com
www.CoachingYourDream.com
Monday, June 28, 2010
Monday, June 21, 2010
How to know your team is going to lose
Here are five clues that the game is over, even if there is still time to play.
1. One team scores in the first five minutes of the game and the other teams energy goes down not up.
2. One team gets calm and the other becomes frustrated. (which do you think will win)
3. One team begins to focus more on hurting the other teams players instead of getting the ball
4. They start to blame the referee and how they are calling the game for their poor performance
5. The team starts arguing with their coach.
Can anybody guess the common denominator? That’s right attitude. Attitude is everything in business and in life. If you struggle at all with your attitude come talk with me. My initial interview is free.
Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLCC
(404) 259-1335
blog@CoachingYourDreams.com
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Seven things that impacted my allergies
One of the biggest challenges I have faced in my forties is allergies. I have heard others complain about allergies and the impact it had on their lives but I never experienced it until this year. I still can not imagine what it would be like to have allergies since my childhood. I do understand now how much it effects mood and health. Since December my allergies have impacted my mood, my breathing, my sleep and my energy.
Sounds like fun I know, having allergies is a hoot. It is June and I am breathing again although still not at 100%. I have tried several remedies so far. Here is what has worked for me (I am not a doctor):
1. Lots of water
2. Netty pot (warm salt water nose irrigation)
3. Walfinate from Walgreens
4. Lung Tonic from (Herbs) liquid form
5. Activated Quercitin
6. Sleep
7. Changing my attitude
Remember in life Attitude is everything and the grumpier we are the grumpier people are around us. Staying positive when we feel like crud will actually make us feel better. Take what ever medication you are going to take particularly if prescribed by your doctor. Then add a heavy dose of good attitude on top and see how much better you feel.
Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLCC
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
(404) 259-1335
Sounds like fun I know, having allergies is a hoot. It is June and I am breathing again although still not at 100%. I have tried several remedies so far. Here is what has worked for me (I am not a doctor):
1. Lots of water
2. Netty pot (warm salt water nose irrigation)
3. Walfinate from Walgreens
4. Lung Tonic from (Herbs) liquid form
5. Activated Quercitin
6. Sleep
7. Changing my attitude
Remember in life Attitude is everything and the grumpier we are the grumpier people are around us. Staying positive when we feel like crud will actually make us feel better. Take what ever medication you are going to take particularly if prescribed by your doctor. Then add a heavy dose of good attitude on top and see how much better you feel.
Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLCC
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
(404) 259-1335
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
The 10 things I learned on my trip to Florida
1. Traveling in a big group of friends can be lots of fun
2. Traveling in a big group of friends can be a little stressful
3. Bring all the sunscreen you can get your hands on
4. The rain only last about ten minutes in the gulf, but it rains 12 times a day
5. When it does rain you will ended up soaked in a matter of seconds
6. Playing soccer barefoot on the beach is painful
7. Stingrays like to come near the shore in the morning to eat
8. Sometimes the smallest pizza parlor has the best pizza (mmm, mmm good)
9. Drunk people leave a lot of trash on the beach
10. Always pick up your trash on the beach (and any left by silly people)
I love taking a vacation and recharging, make sure you take one soon.
Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLCC
(404) 259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
2. Traveling in a big group of friends can be a little stressful
3. Bring all the sunscreen you can get your hands on
4. The rain only last about ten minutes in the gulf, but it rains 12 times a day
5. When it does rain you will ended up soaked in a matter of seconds
6. Playing soccer barefoot on the beach is painful
7. Stingrays like to come near the shore in the morning to eat
8. Sometimes the smallest pizza parlor has the best pizza (mmm, mmm good)
9. Drunk people leave a lot of trash on the beach
10. Always pick up your trash on the beach (and any left by silly people)
I love taking a vacation and recharging, make sure you take one soon.
Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLCC
(404) 259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
Monday, May 24, 2010
Bending Time
It is a beautiful inspiring day here in Tucker, GA there is a light breeze, the sun is shining and the temperature is around 70 degrees. I am sitting on my recently built deck breathing and enjoying the day. My dog Lulu is sitting next to me growling at the neighbors as they work in the yard. I am three hours behind schedule. It is amazing how time goes by so quickly any woman with kids, a job or both knows. I am experimenting this month with scheduling to see if I can bend time (that is have time to do everything I want). My mentor Dr. Duckett says you must have a good schedule to bend time.
Here are the options:
1. Do the big stuff in the morning and then the little stuff in the afternoon
2. Schedule everything but no times attached
3. Schedule everything and have time frames for each event.
After picking which one you like do this:
The first Monday of the month take the whole day to work on your month’s schedule. Then every Monday after spend at least thirty minutes scheduling the week. This kind of scheduling is particularly important to entrepreneurs; it can also be helpful to mothers and anyone women employed who wants to start a business. You just spend a proportional amount of time scheduling i.e. if you only have ten hours a week to work on your business you may not take the whole day to schedule you may take two to three hours at the beginning of the month and then only fifteen minutes every week after that. No matter what you must schedule yourself otherwise you may get things done, but it will be inefficient and you will feel disorganized. As with everything I discuss it takes practice and we are not looking for perfection only permanence.
Right now option three is winning for me because I get a lot more done when I have times actually written down. I know of several people where option one works great as well. Option two seems to leave to much room for disorganization.
If you are tired of feeling disorganized and confused contact me at:
Greta Jaeger, CPLC, LPC
(404) 259-1335
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.coachingyourdreams.com
Here are the options:
1. Do the big stuff in the morning and then the little stuff in the afternoon
2. Schedule everything but no times attached
3. Schedule everything and have time frames for each event.
After picking which one you like do this:
The first Monday of the month take the whole day to work on your month’s schedule. Then every Monday after spend at least thirty minutes scheduling the week. This kind of scheduling is particularly important to entrepreneurs; it can also be helpful to mothers and anyone women employed who wants to start a business. You just spend a proportional amount of time scheduling i.e. if you only have ten hours a week to work on your business you may not take the whole day to schedule you may take two to three hours at the beginning of the month and then only fifteen minutes every week after that. No matter what you must schedule yourself otherwise you may get things done, but it will be inefficient and you will feel disorganized. As with everything I discuss it takes practice and we are not looking for perfection only permanence.
Right now option three is winning for me because I get a lot more done when I have times actually written down. I know of several people where option one works great as well. Option two seems to leave to much room for disorganization.
If you are tired of feeling disorganized and confused contact me at:
Greta Jaeger, CPLC, LPC
(404) 259-1335
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.coachingyourdreams.com
Friday, May 21, 2010
Asking different question
I have been struggling with what to write about today. It could be the weather; it is rainy and cold in May. I decided I was asking myself the wrong question; instead of “What should I write today” the question should be “What do I want to share”. Then it hit me like a flash, I want to talk about asking the right questions of our selves. One of the biggest challenges we face when we are feeling bad and our self esteem is low, are the rotten question we ask of our selves.
When we are down, a standard question is “Why do I feel so down?” Then we look around for a reason or excuse for feeling down so we can justify our mood and stay stuck. When somebody criticizes us or is mad, we may ask ourselves “Why am I such a screw up?” or “What did I do to make them mad?”. Next time ask yourself “What is going on with so and so that they are so upset right now?” or “I wonder why that is a button for them” and “is there something I can do differently that might help us communicate better?” These are just some quick examples at how just changing what we ask ourselves will help us feel better. When we ask the wrong question we end up blaming ourselves or someone else and then we feel badly.
When we are down, a standard question is “Why do I feel so down?” Then we look around for a reason or excuse for feeling down so we can justify our mood and stay stuck. When somebody criticizes us or is mad, we may ask ourselves “Why am I such a screw up?” or “What did I do to make them mad?”. Next time ask yourself “What is going on with so and so that they are so upset right now?” or “I wonder why that is a button for them” and “is there something I can do differently that might help us communicate better?” These are just some quick examples at how just changing what we ask ourselves will help us feel better. When we ask the wrong question we end up blaming ourselves or someone else and then we feel badly.
Monday, May 17, 2010
Don't forget to be grateful
I spoke with a client today and she reminded me how important gratitude is in life. She was shot several times and suffered major brain damage as a police officer. Imagine she had to learn to walk and talk all over again, wow. When this happened it meant her life would never be the same.
She told me that because of that experience she was lead back to the love of her life, and she is grateful everyday for that. She also still lives in service of others but not as a police officer instead she speaks in support of police officers and their wants and needs, if they become disabled. She is one of the kindest, most considerate and beautiful people I know. She lives in gratitude everyday despite her tragedy or you might say because of it. If you want to know more about her follow this link: http://bit.ly/adtdpU
She told me that because of that experience she was lead back to the love of her life, and she is grateful everyday for that. She also still lives in service of others but not as a police officer instead she speaks in support of police officers and their wants and needs, if they become disabled. She is one of the kindest, most considerate and beautiful people I know. She lives in gratitude everyday despite her tragedy or you might say because of it. If you want to know more about her follow this link: http://bit.ly/adtdpU
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Being Present
How do we stay in the moment, be present, and learn to live for now without forgetting to build towards a future? Why learn to stay present? First can you change the past? NO. Can you take action in the future? NO. The only state of mind we can take action in or change is “NOW”. If we want a better life we can learn from the past and we can plan for the future and get results in the here and now. So now we know the two biggest blocks to living in the present, are the past and future. The emotion that most people experience when concentrating on the past and future is some kind of FEAR. Fear is de-motivating and spirit crushing. The craziest part is we will even learn from other people’s negative experiences in the past as well, to confirm why we should or should not do something to change our lives.
There are many powerful teachers and motivators in our lives fear from past experiences and fear of failure are two negative ones. You must ask your self is this how I want to live? Living with fear stops you from pursuing your passion and purpose in life. One way to conquer fear and live the life we want is stay and live in the now the present. Here are some techniques to try. Find the ones you like that help you stay present and incorporate them in your daily life.
Homework:
Get out of your head and get into your body, take a deep breath and feel your body experience it right now, any aches, pains, the absence of aches or pains, pressure, itchy and feel your emotions in this moments what are they calm, nervous, good, happy, frustrated. Just check out your emotions and notice them don’t do anything about them just be in the emotion. Do this daily for 1 or 2 minutes.
Meditate- jump on-line and pick a meditation or email me and I will send you one specific to what you want to meditate about. Do this daily, time can vary depending on the meditation style that you pick I prefer a more active meditation which is why I use Kundalini yoga meditations which can be any where from three minutes to an hour.
Reframe your thoughts- when you catch yourself thinking about the past, change the statement i.e. “Can you believe that person cut me off and almost made me crash my car” becomes “That person who cut me off must have had something awfully important to do like visit their father on his death bed or they would not be driving so dangerously”. Sounds silly but it works. Practicing compassion in your reframes is important. There will be more on reframing and reprogramming your mind in later blogs.
Greta Jaeger, PLC, LPC
(404) 259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
www.YouCanHaveItAll.WordPress.com
There are many powerful teachers and motivators in our lives fear from past experiences and fear of failure are two negative ones. You must ask your self is this how I want to live? Living with fear stops you from pursuing your passion and purpose in life. One way to conquer fear and live the life we want is stay and live in the now the present. Here are some techniques to try. Find the ones you like that help you stay present and incorporate them in your daily life.
Homework:
Get out of your head and get into your body, take a deep breath and feel your body experience it right now, any aches, pains, the absence of aches or pains, pressure, itchy and feel your emotions in this moments what are they calm, nervous, good, happy, frustrated. Just check out your emotions and notice them don’t do anything about them just be in the emotion. Do this daily for 1 or 2 minutes.
Meditate- jump on-line and pick a meditation or email me and I will send you one specific to what you want to meditate about. Do this daily, time can vary depending on the meditation style that you pick I prefer a more active meditation which is why I use Kundalini yoga meditations which can be any where from three minutes to an hour.
Reframe your thoughts- when you catch yourself thinking about the past, change the statement i.e. “Can you believe that person cut me off and almost made me crash my car” becomes “That person who cut me off must have had something awfully important to do like visit their father on his death bed or they would not be driving so dangerously”. Sounds silly but it works. Practicing compassion in your reframes is important. There will be more on reframing and reprogramming your mind in later blogs.
Greta Jaeger, PLC, LPC
(404) 259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
www.YouCanHaveItAll.WordPress.com
Friday, May 7, 2010
10 ideas for Spring cleaning your mind
1. Let go trying to please everyone
2. Let go thinking you are alone
3. Let go thinking you are always right
4. Breathe
5. Let go the need to be liked by everyone
6. Let go of the past hurts, forgive
7. Stop putting yourself down
8. Practice gratitude daily
9. If you are afraid of doing something, then do it
10. Let go of any negative people in your life
Tired of hearing yourself say “Is this as good as it gets”? Ready to start fresh and clean your house and mind? Call or email to receive your free initial interview:
Greta Jaeger,LPC, CPLC www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
(404) 259-1335
Please send any questions to:
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my
blog and I will get back to you.
2. Let go thinking you are alone
3. Let go thinking you are always right
4. Breathe
5. Let go the need to be liked by everyone
6. Let go of the past hurts, forgive
7. Stop putting yourself down
8. Practice gratitude daily
9. If you are afraid of doing something, then do it
10. Let go of any negative people in your life
Tired of hearing yourself say “Is this as good as it gets”? Ready to start fresh and clean your house and mind? Call or email to receive your free initial interview:
Greta Jaeger,LPC, CPLC www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
(404) 259-1335
Please send any questions to:
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my
blog and I will get back to you.
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Do you have a case of the "Yeah, buts"
Spring is an interesting time because many of us begin either to change or think about changing. I have been out talking with a lot of different types of people and I find it interesting how often we talk ourselves out of changing. I call it the “Yeah, buts”.
The two yeah buts I hear the most are "Yeah, but I don’t have enough time" and "Yeah, but I can’t do that." Have you ever suffered from the yeah, buts? It is common to find reasons not to change because staying where we are is a known situation and changing is not. I have known friends to have the yeah, buts for years. They become a broken record of yeah, buts to justify why they are not moving forward and changing their lives for the better.
Eventually we either tire of making excuses or we become bored with ourselves and our lives. Boredom is a killer: it numbs our emotions, slaughters our sex life, and obliterates good communication with those we love the most. It does not sound like fun, I know. Boredom creeps up on us because we are not honoring ourselves and our need to change and move forward. Change is a natural part of being human. But if we don’t learn to remove the yeah, buts from our lives, we will be ill prepared when change is thrown at us by circumstance and life.
It might be scary to throw out the excuses and take on our fears but at least we will be in control of the direction our lives take. We won’t be bored. We won’t be boring. It is exciting to talk with people following their dreams and putting the yeah, buts behind them.
I challenge you to face one of your own yeah, buts for one week and see how you feel at the end of it. Were you scared? Energized? Excited? Frustrated? Happy? Bored?
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
(404) 259-1335
Please send any questions to:
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my blog and I will get back to you.
The two yeah buts I hear the most are "Yeah, but I don’t have enough time" and "Yeah, but I can’t do that." Have you ever suffered from the yeah, buts? It is common to find reasons not to change because staying where we are is a known situation and changing is not. I have known friends to have the yeah, buts for years. They become a broken record of yeah, buts to justify why they are not moving forward and changing their lives for the better.
Eventually we either tire of making excuses or we become bored with ourselves and our lives. Boredom is a killer: it numbs our emotions, slaughters our sex life, and obliterates good communication with those we love the most. It does not sound like fun, I know. Boredom creeps up on us because we are not honoring ourselves and our need to change and move forward. Change is a natural part of being human. But if we don’t learn to remove the yeah, buts from our lives, we will be ill prepared when change is thrown at us by circumstance and life.
It might be scary to throw out the excuses and take on our fears but at least we will be in control of the direction our lives take. We won’t be bored. We won’t be boring. It is exciting to talk with people following their dreams and putting the yeah, buts behind them.
I challenge you to face one of your own yeah, buts for one week and see how you feel at the end of it. Were you scared? Energized? Excited? Frustrated? Happy? Bored?
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
(404) 259-1335
Please send any questions to:
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my blog and I will get back to you.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Disciple and Positive thinking
There are several books presently sitting on my old mahogany lawyer’s desk, many of which are about speaking and inspiring others. There is one, in particular, though, that I’d like to mention, titled “Peace, which is full of quotes by Mahatma Ghandi. Now, if there was ever a man that had the ability to control his mind, it was Ghandi. In the name of “Peace”, he could go for long periods of time without eating. In fact, he ran an entire peace movement against a violent government, based on “love”, instead of anger, and won. If there ever was an accidental politician, it was him.
What did Ghandi have that we don’t have… or don’t have yet? How was he able to face insurmountable odds so fearlessly and lovingly? Perhaps it was a combination of a few of his character traits, such as his discipline, persistence, compassion, drive, focus, along with his inspiring ways. Today, though, I’d like to turn your attention to discipline.
Unfortunately, discipline is not easily found in the American culture. The most obvious places to look are in the areas of sports and business. If we consider sports celebrities for a moment, though, they may excel at their sport, but many often get caught up in drugs, alcohol, and abusive or bad marriages. They may be successful in their careers, but they lack that same success and discipline in their personal lives. I believe this may be a result of our cultural belief that if you are disciplined, then you can’t possibly have any fun, and perhaps you’ll even tend to be a bit militaristic.
Wall Street is another place where there has been no discipline. If the people running these companies had controlled their greed, they would still be making money. Perhaps they wouldn’t make it as quickly or make as much, but it would not have disappeared instantly as it did at the beginning of our current recession.
If we want to successfully throw off our negative thinking, then we have to learn and choose some skills that will help us in this process. We then need to use discipline when practicing them. If you read my last blog, I informed you of two skills that will significantly reduce your negative thinking. If you are disciplined in your approach and incorporate these techniques into your daily life, you’re certain to find success. Remember… practice, practice, practice and more practice makes permanent.
Here is a suggestion that can help you make discipline a habit in your life:
First - Pick a skill you want to learn. In this example, we will use catching your negative thoughts and reframing them.
Second - Write down any negative thoughts that you know you have consistently, and then write a positive reframe.
Third - Three times a day, practice a positive reframe with all of the negative thoughts you wrote down.
Fourth - During your day, if and when you catch a negative thought or story playing in your mind, take a deep breath and positively reframe it, and/or think about how you can create an action around that negative thought.
If you are diligent and perform this process for the next thirty days, it will start to become a habit. If you are disciplined and continue on for another month or two, it will become very natural for you to reframe your negative thoughts.
If you are tired of your negative thoughts and struggling to get out of the rut you are in email or call Greta Jaeger she is a master at reframing and she will accelerate your learning process. You will move from stuck to pursue your dreams call or email now.
Greta Jaeger, LPC, PCLC
404-259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
www.blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
Please send any questions to:
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my blog and I will get back to you.
What did Ghandi have that we don’t have… or don’t have yet? How was he able to face insurmountable odds so fearlessly and lovingly? Perhaps it was a combination of a few of his character traits, such as his discipline, persistence, compassion, drive, focus, along with his inspiring ways. Today, though, I’d like to turn your attention to discipline.
Unfortunately, discipline is not easily found in the American culture. The most obvious places to look are in the areas of sports and business. If we consider sports celebrities for a moment, though, they may excel at their sport, but many often get caught up in drugs, alcohol, and abusive or bad marriages. They may be successful in their careers, but they lack that same success and discipline in their personal lives. I believe this may be a result of our cultural belief that if you are disciplined, then you can’t possibly have any fun, and perhaps you’ll even tend to be a bit militaristic.
Wall Street is another place where there has been no discipline. If the people running these companies had controlled their greed, they would still be making money. Perhaps they wouldn’t make it as quickly or make as much, but it would not have disappeared instantly as it did at the beginning of our current recession.
If we want to successfully throw off our negative thinking, then we have to learn and choose some skills that will help us in this process. We then need to use discipline when practicing them. If you read my last blog, I informed you of two skills that will significantly reduce your negative thinking. If you are disciplined in your approach and incorporate these techniques into your daily life, you’re certain to find success. Remember… practice, practice, practice and more practice makes permanent.
Here is a suggestion that can help you make discipline a habit in your life:
First - Pick a skill you want to learn. In this example, we will use catching your negative thoughts and reframing them.
Second - Write down any negative thoughts that you know you have consistently, and then write a positive reframe.
Third - Three times a day, practice a positive reframe with all of the negative thoughts you wrote down.
Fourth - During your day, if and when you catch a negative thought or story playing in your mind, take a deep breath and positively reframe it, and/or think about how you can create an action around that negative thought.
If you are diligent and perform this process for the next thirty days, it will start to become a habit. If you are disciplined and continue on for another month or two, it will become very natural for you to reframe your negative thoughts.
If you are tired of your negative thoughts and struggling to get out of the rut you are in email or call Greta Jaeger she is a master at reframing and she will accelerate your learning process. You will move from stuck to pursue your dreams call or email now.
Greta Jaeger, LPC, PCLC
404-259-1335
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
www.blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
Please send any questions to:
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my blog and I will get back to you.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Learning to Control your Thoughts
Recently, I received a comment suggesting that I go into more detail the next time I write about the topic of controlling one’s mind. By the way, I appreciate the feedback. When I write, I do often tend to remain brief. However, that is not always best or beneficial, as in this case. So, in this post, we’ll discuss this topic further.
Learning to control my mind has been a life long struggle for me. I began the process while in college at U.C. Davis. During this time, I realized I was depressed and had been at least mildly depressed for many years. While graduating with my Bachelors in Psychology, however, I went to a fabulous therapist. We only had a total of fours sessions together, but they were four sessions that would prove invaluable in my quest for growth.
During the first session, she let me know right off the bat that we didn’t have much time. “Let’s get to work,” she spoke, “and you need to know right now that you will have to work hard.” I remember her words and how willing I was to do precisely as she had asked. The tasks given me were simple, but during that period, they changed my life. Now, I’m going to share what I learned with you.
Plainly put, here are the initials steps I needed to take.
First – I began journaling daily. I simply scribbled down whatever came to me in the moment.
Second - I had to learn how to say “no” to my parents to begin establishing my necessary separation from them.
Third - I had to not only start, but also consistently practice, reframing my negative thoughts.
Although I had a good idea, at this point, what “reframing” was all about, I was by no means an expert. In fact, it took a great deal of time and application before I finally began to master these concepts. Now, I can share my expertise with you, helping you achieve in a matter of months… or even weeks… what took me years to learn. I’m here to tell you that, by following some simple steps, you truly can and will become the MASTER of your OWN MIND.
There are two vital things I want you to keep in mind right now – the importance of breath and the art of reframing negative thoughts. The foundation breath and the ability to reframe our thoughts are two things that help our minds become open to new ideas and new ways of being in the world. When we stay in a negative state of mind, we stay in a state in which we tend to focus on and seek out negativity within ourselves as well as our environments. We become inept at finding the good side of something even when the positive aspects are obvious. For example, it’s a bright, sunny beautiful day, but instead of enjoying the weather, we only notice the heat and humidity and feel compelled to complain about it.
It becomes a habit to see the negative. In fact, as humans, our survival instincts are geared this way, to some degree. The “fight or flight” instinct is one of those innate parts of our make-up that aids us in recognizing danger. The problem, however, is this. We’re no longer running from tigers and bears, yet we’re still living life as if we were in survival mode. People have evolved since the age of hunters and gatherers and our mind has the capacity to control its’ thoughts and reactions. Learning to reframe your thoughts can help significantly in changing some of these negative thought processes, habits, and behaviors.
Humans have an average of 5,000 to 6,000 thoughts a day. Most of these are negative or neutral. The majority of us, through our conditioning, have unconsciously made negativity a habit. There is good news, though! If we can become a master at negative thinking, this means that we can also become masters at POSITIVE thinking. All it takes is practice.
First, we have to learn how to take notice of our thoughts. Right after you catch a negative thought, practice taking in a nice long deep breath. The next step is one that takes a lot of practice and creativity. This is the point in which we reframe the negative thought we just caught and turn it into a positive statement.
Here are some examples:
Negative – “I can’t do it.”
Positive – “I can do it.” Alternatively, you could say, “I can do it. I just haven’t learned how yet.”
Negative – “This sucks, another traffic jam!”
Positive – “Traffic is slow again today.” Alternatively, “Traffic is slow, giving me a few minutes to practice some deep breathing.”
Negative – “My job sucks.”
Positive – “I’m not enjoying my job right now.” Alternatively, “I love this part of my job (insert info),” or “I enjoy parts of my job (list them), and some, I don’t. Can I do anything about the parts I don’t like?”
Sometimes, you’ll notice the reframe still sounds a little negative. You may have also noticed that the reframe consists of an action statement, the purpose being to drive you towards making a change. In the end, moving forward (doing something) is more positive than sitting in your yucky, sucky, negativity. Believe it or not, even when we make what appears to be the wrong choice, it is often better than making no choice at all. If we’re moving, it will shake things up. I am not advocating that you make bad or unwise choices. I am simply challenging you, trying to help you understand that until you do make a choice, you will remain stuck. The easiest choice is to change our thinking, making it either action- oriented and positive or just positive.
When we practice reframing, we must remember that we are not our thoughts and our thoughts do not control us. We control our thoughts or we choose not to control them. Do not expect that you will gain instant gratification using these methods. It takes practice and practice makes permanent, not perfect. Please also remember that if you have been diagnosed with depression or anxiety, this is not a replacement for any treatment your doctor is presently administering. These are supplemental techniques that you can use daily to improve your life.
Please send any questions to:
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my blog and I will get back to you.
To contact me:
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
Learning to control my mind has been a life long struggle for me. I began the process while in college at U.C. Davis. During this time, I realized I was depressed and had been at least mildly depressed for many years. While graduating with my Bachelors in Psychology, however, I went to a fabulous therapist. We only had a total of fours sessions together, but they were four sessions that would prove invaluable in my quest for growth.
During the first session, she let me know right off the bat that we didn’t have much time. “Let’s get to work,” she spoke, “and you need to know right now that you will have to work hard.” I remember her words and how willing I was to do precisely as she had asked. The tasks given me were simple, but during that period, they changed my life. Now, I’m going to share what I learned with you.
Plainly put, here are the initials steps I needed to take.
First – I began journaling daily. I simply scribbled down whatever came to me in the moment.
Second - I had to learn how to say “no” to my parents to begin establishing my necessary separation from them.
Third - I had to not only start, but also consistently practice, reframing my negative thoughts.
Although I had a good idea, at this point, what “reframing” was all about, I was by no means an expert. In fact, it took a great deal of time and application before I finally began to master these concepts. Now, I can share my expertise with you, helping you achieve in a matter of months… or even weeks… what took me years to learn. I’m here to tell you that, by following some simple steps, you truly can and will become the MASTER of your OWN MIND.
There are two vital things I want you to keep in mind right now – the importance of breath and the art of reframing negative thoughts. The foundation breath and the ability to reframe our thoughts are two things that help our minds become open to new ideas and new ways of being in the world. When we stay in a negative state of mind, we stay in a state in which we tend to focus on and seek out negativity within ourselves as well as our environments. We become inept at finding the good side of something even when the positive aspects are obvious. For example, it’s a bright, sunny beautiful day, but instead of enjoying the weather, we only notice the heat and humidity and feel compelled to complain about it.
It becomes a habit to see the negative. In fact, as humans, our survival instincts are geared this way, to some degree. The “fight or flight” instinct is one of those innate parts of our make-up that aids us in recognizing danger. The problem, however, is this. We’re no longer running from tigers and bears, yet we’re still living life as if we were in survival mode. People have evolved since the age of hunters and gatherers and our mind has the capacity to control its’ thoughts and reactions. Learning to reframe your thoughts can help significantly in changing some of these negative thought processes, habits, and behaviors.
Humans have an average of 5,000 to 6,000 thoughts a day. Most of these are negative or neutral. The majority of us, through our conditioning, have unconsciously made negativity a habit. There is good news, though! If we can become a master at negative thinking, this means that we can also become masters at POSITIVE thinking. All it takes is practice.
First, we have to learn how to take notice of our thoughts. Right after you catch a negative thought, practice taking in a nice long deep breath. The next step is one that takes a lot of practice and creativity. This is the point in which we reframe the negative thought we just caught and turn it into a positive statement.
Here are some examples:
Negative – “I can’t do it.”
Positive – “I can do it.” Alternatively, you could say, “I can do it. I just haven’t learned how yet.”
Negative – “This sucks, another traffic jam!”
Positive – “Traffic is slow again today.” Alternatively, “Traffic is slow, giving me a few minutes to practice some deep breathing.”
Negative – “My job sucks.”
Positive – “I’m not enjoying my job right now.” Alternatively, “I love this part of my job (insert info),” or “I enjoy parts of my job (list them), and some, I don’t. Can I do anything about the parts I don’t like?”
Sometimes, you’ll notice the reframe still sounds a little negative. You may have also noticed that the reframe consists of an action statement, the purpose being to drive you towards making a change. In the end, moving forward (doing something) is more positive than sitting in your yucky, sucky, negativity. Believe it or not, even when we make what appears to be the wrong choice, it is often better than making no choice at all. If we’re moving, it will shake things up. I am not advocating that you make bad or unwise choices. I am simply challenging you, trying to help you understand that until you do make a choice, you will remain stuck. The easiest choice is to change our thinking, making it either action- oriented and positive or just positive.
When we practice reframing, we must remember that we are not our thoughts and our thoughts do not control us. We control our thoughts or we choose not to control them. Do not expect that you will gain instant gratification using these methods. It takes practice and practice makes permanent, not perfect. Please also remember that if you have been diagnosed with depression or anxiety, this is not a replacement for any treatment your doctor is presently administering. These are supplemental techniques that you can use daily to improve your life.
Please send any questions to:
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my blog and I will get back to you.
To contact me:
Greta Jaeger, LPC, CPLC
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
This one is for mom's
Finish this sentence for yourself:
I have always wanted to ……. but haven’t because ………
Now look at the last part of the sentence that starts with “because.” I mean really look at it, observe it. Take several deep breaths and ask yourself: is this truly a good reason not to do what I want, or is it just a fear? If it is a fear then it is time to tackle that fear head on. There is no true way to bury a fear; it will always come back and bite you in the butt later. We have to learn to let go of our fears and move forward.
"You must do that thing you think you can not do" – Eleanor Roosevelt
It is easy as women to think “my priority is my family” and I agree whole heartedly. Here is where I get confused: exactly when did your family become minus you? Are you not a part of your own family? If your family is a priority, then logically so are you. They don’t make comments like “the family is only happy if mom is happy” for no reason at all. It is true.
To be happy you must pursue your passions and dreams as well as encourage, inspire and support your family in their pursuits. To confront your fear and do what you want is as simple as moving into action. If you want to start your own business, take one small step; go to the library and get books on how start a business. If you want to go back to school, go online and check out some schools. Try attending class an hour a week; it's nothing big, just small steps. I know of a woman who was so busy she could only take one class a semester. Four years later she went in to talk with her advisor and he told her she had one more class to go to receive her masters. It may seem like a long time, but she could have not gone at all and would still not have her masters. Small steps are the easiest and as long as you stay focused on our goal you will get there.
If you want more information on how to move through your fear contact me at:
Greta Jaeger, CPLC, LPC
(404) 259-1335
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
I have always wanted to ……. but haven’t because ………
Now look at the last part of the sentence that starts with “because.” I mean really look at it, observe it. Take several deep breaths and ask yourself: is this truly a good reason not to do what I want, or is it just a fear? If it is a fear then it is time to tackle that fear head on. There is no true way to bury a fear; it will always come back and bite you in the butt later. We have to learn to let go of our fears and move forward.
"You must do that thing you think you can not do" – Eleanor Roosevelt
It is easy as women to think “my priority is my family” and I agree whole heartedly. Here is where I get confused: exactly when did your family become minus you? Are you not a part of your own family? If your family is a priority, then logically so are you. They don’t make comments like “the family is only happy if mom is happy” for no reason at all. It is true.
To be happy you must pursue your passions and dreams as well as encourage, inspire and support your family in their pursuits. To confront your fear and do what you want is as simple as moving into action. If you want to start your own business, take one small step; go to the library and get books on how start a business. If you want to go back to school, go online and check out some schools. Try attending class an hour a week; it's nothing big, just small steps. I know of a woman who was so busy she could only take one class a semester. Four years later she went in to talk with her advisor and he told her she had one more class to go to receive her masters. It may seem like a long time, but she could have not gone at all and would still not have her masters. Small steps are the easiest and as long as you stay focused on our goal you will get there.
If you want more information on how to move through your fear contact me at:
Greta Jaeger, CPLC, LPC
(404) 259-1335
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
www.CoachingYourDreams.com
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
Friday, April 23, 2010
Silliness or Character flaw
Occasionally I struggle when falling asleep. The other night was an example of this; I fell asleep around 3:00am or 3:30am. All together I slept about two hours that night. I had a Life Coaching meeting that morning at 7:30am. I gave up caffeine three weeks prior, I gave in and decided to have some caffeinated coffee, but before the coffee could kick in I was already driving to my coaching group. I was merging from one freeway to another and my turn signal light stayed on. I attempted several times to turn off the blinker, but only managed to turn on and off the windshield wipers multiple times. I stared at the wipers dumbfounded. How could this be happening? I am trying to turn off the blinker, I said to myself.
I took a deep breath and asked myself, if the control for the blinker is not on the right of my steering wheel where could it be? Then inspiration hit “ahha, it must be on the left” and magically I could turn the blinkers off. I felt so silly all I could do was laugh. In case you were wondering the coffee did kick in eventually but by then I was already at the meeting with all my neurons firing. Often at times like this we judge ourselves harshly and I say don’t. Allow yourself a good laugh at your own expense and chalk it up to just one of those moments. If you only get one thing from reading this blog learn to take your-self lightly. A guide to follow is:
1. Learn not to be easily offended
2. Learn to laugh and enjoy yourself when you’re silly:
don’t consider it a character flaw.
You will have a much more relaxed life when you practice these ideas.
Please send any questions to:
greta@CoachingYourDreams.com
Please put in the subject line “Question for Coach Greta” or leave a comment on my blog and I will get back to you.
Greta Jaeger, LPC, PLC
(404) 259-1335
blog.CoachingYourDreams.com
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)